If there were a test for being a girl, I would FAIL.

[cherry]

Am alive. Was eaten by school, but was fortunately carrying Swiss Army Knife, and managed to hack my way free.

Went shopping today with a friend, spurred by the fear of not having pants. Pants are overrated anyway. Potato sacks for all, hurrah!

I was, unfortunately, banned from shopping in the men's section. This led to much angst on my part, as I tend to purchase most of my clothes there. One of the guys called me whilst we were out, and seemed to think this moratorium was a good idea. (What? They're less expensive, better made, and more comfortable. Also, they rarely have decorative holes in places you are not expecting them. Women's clothing is designed to be disposable, as you are supposed to want/need the new model at this time next year anyway.)

It is quite possible I spent almost $200. But for that, I did get three pairs of jeans, one pair of dress pants, a dress shirt, and a sweater. I also possibly discovered that sneaker shopping is in my near future. I've been wearing the same pair since grade 11 -- and that's five years, dear god -- but they've taken a distinct turn for the worse in the last two or three months.


In other news: Questions that are embarrassing to ask at the ripe old age of 21:

Me: So, how do you tell what colours of eyeshadow look good on you?
Sales Girl: o.0
Me: And I hear something about having to use multiple colours at once?
Sales Girl: o.0!!

But seriously: When you consider the permutations and combinations provided by the current cosmetics industry -- colours and types of mascara, blush, eyeshadow, eyeliner, lipstuff; the number of brands providing these options that can be combined; the number of ways in which each selected combination can be applied...

OMG, calculus is less complicated, people. Seriously.


As a side note: North Americans spend almost as much on cosmetics every year as it would take to educate every single person in the world for that same time frame.


** It has been brought to attention that this all might be taken as evidence for some so-called "girliness" on my part. That conclusion would be deeply erroneous.

Comments

[firebird308.livejournal.com]

::looks at her unused makeup and offers it to you::

At least Mom finally gave up on getting me any. >_> I'd look weird in makeup with my usual jeans/shorts and a t-shirt on anyway.

[tellitslant]

Dude! Did you buy makeup! omg who are you and what have you done with Cherry? *g*

[http://users.livejournal.com/_medley_/]

Uhm, hope you don't mind a random stranger wandering in here, but I'm glad I'm not the only one who kind of feels like I missed a class somewhere in the being-a-girl department, at least where overly complicated eye makeup is involved. It's like they expect people to just know these things.

Maybe it's because I subscribe to the "fashion magazines just make you feel ugly" school of thought.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_bounce_/]

Dude. If it weren't for the fact that I have to take the legs up a really stupid amount, i'd get all my pants in the men's section. :) And I'm with you on the eyeshadow thing. My sister has decided that I need to learn to do mascara and I'm not even going near the rest of that stuff.

Also, I'm sorry I snapped at you the other day.

[shayheyred.livejournal.com]

You got a bad salesperson. A savvy one would have let you try on colors and made recommendations for eyeshadow.

[farwing.livejournal.com]

So...regarding eyeshadow: I have only one color that i ever use and it's Acid rain by Urban Decay. All others are not nearly scary-green enough. Color combos are for lipstick! Er...I tend to layer my lipstick. I'm not sure if this is unusual or not. Um...I feel that this gives you the impression that I'm some sort of makeup fiend. I assure you, I am not.

I'm not sure they make men's clothing short enough or small enough for me.

[elvenjen4.livejournal.com]

It's my understanding eyeshadow colors are more matched with your skintone and hair and clothes rather than eye color. But I have no idea what colors look good on me either so, y'know, take that for what it's worth. *g*

The cosmetics industry is insaaane. I'm normally not into it but if my new job gets more business-oriented, I suppose I should start to smooth out my complexion. I know very little about eyeshadows, and eye liner just plain creeps me out, but I can work the mascara...

What made you suddenly go all girly with makeup? :)

[gurrier.livejournal.com]

I love men's clothes with a love that is deep and un-natural. It's the little things like properly stitched hems, pockets, colours I like, pockets, natural fibres, and did I mention pockets? Unfortunately, I'm too, erm, woman-shaped to get a decent fit. Boo hiss.

As for make-up, at 37 I'm still clueless and completely uninterested. I do own one tube of lipstick, which I bought for my wedding. Five years ago. I am a total failure as a girl :)

And hey, the icon you made for me is perfect for this!

[cyberducks.livejournal.com]

Maybe I should start wearing man's pants - I have a heck of a time finding jeans that flatter my behind.

My make-up consists of burt's bees tinted lip gloss, a bit of foundation and a bit of very subtle rouge on my cheeks to make me look more glowy and less pale. I refuse to wear eye make-up.

[sprat.livejournal.com]

You're braver than I am, venturing into the cosmetics world. The only times I've ever worn any, it had to be put on me by smarter people, in this mysterious process I've never been able to follow. Likewise hair things--I can braid, and have learned, over time, how to use small amounts of hair goop to keep things from getting really out of hand, but that's about the extent of it. I still have to be escorted to the hair dresser, because otherwise I have no idea how to tell them what I want. *loses at girl-ness*

[curlyjo1.livejournal.com]

I wear girly clothes, but I hear you on the makeup thing. I actually asked my mom, "Oh God, do I HAVE to wear makeup for the wedding?" I might wear lipstick. That's the usual extent of my makeup, and that's for special occasions.

[dkphoenix.livejournal.com]

I like makeup. :-) But I hear ya on the men's clothes. Their t-shirts and sweatpants especially are light years better made at half the price.

The brown eyeshadow thing is a bit of a copout on the part of the makeup counter clerks. Yes, it works with blue eyes. It works with any color eyes. Speaking for my blue-eyed self, I like plummy purples and shades of charcoal best, but khaki/greenish brown and bronzes and coppers look good, too. (Blue eyeshadow is bad on everyone. And let's not even get into pink.) You can easily get by with two of those three colors in one eyeshadow combos that the discount stores sell, a muted color one for business and one with a little bit of sparkle for going out. (Or you can skip the sparkly one for evenings, if you want, and just use your daytime colors a little darker.) A charcoal gray eyeliner is best unless you're really blonde or really dark, only put it around the outer 2/3s of your eye, though, drawing a line all the way to the inner corner makes your eyes look small.